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Family Law: divorce proceedings, conclusion of marriage (USA)
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Question

Borya and I have one child, Ariela, out of wedlock. Borya actually never wanted the child and even wanted me to have an abortion. But when I carried Ariela to term, all of a sudden Borya decided he wanted to see her every week and take her to his parents to play with her. The child is 9 months old and I always want to keep the baby by my side. Can the court force me to give the child to Borya, away from me, even though we were never married?

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Answer

Whether or not you will succeed in court depends upon the reasons why you do not wish to give Ariela to Borya away from your home. Is it because you are angry at Borya for not supporting you during pregnancy? Is it because Borya is maniac depressive? Is he incapable when it comes to changing diapers and providing proper nutrition for Ariela? Are members of his family raving lunatics? Chances are there are not. In that case you should work out some reasonable schedule - perhaps a schedule where Borya will see Ariela several hours a week until she is 1 or 2 years old. If Borya is a threat to the child, when you are in court - be careful to back up all of your complaints against Borya with hard evidence. You will certainly need a competent lawyer. Where mothers have filed false child neglect complaints against their boyfriends - in some extreme cases -- mothers have lost custody because they were allegedly alienating the fathers from the children. Remember, the court will look at the best interests of the child, not yours or Borya's. The presumption is that its best for the child to have meaningful relationship with both parents - you and Borya.

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